A woman’s Cleavage (a cautionary tale)

If a sober guy looks at your bosom, tell him to “please stop” and 98% will.

Moments such as these are milestones a young boy will remember for the rest of his life

I have a brief tale to tell though before you ask, because I know you are curious! NO I didn’t take these lady’s photos, most definitely not but if you’re a prolific Google imager like myself then you never know what you will discover if you search hard enough.

😋 She fit’s my post!

🤔 Perhaps a cautionary tale though, goes to show ladies have to be very aware of men and their digital cameras, lean forward ‘snap’ and the boobs are on the internet!…………….. But not to worry, I’m using this lady both for a genuine reason and I’m assured she’s an anonymous D list celebrity? Hmm lol “I’m sayin nothin!”

Within my more thoughtful posts I have touched on the serious subject of sexual harassment, with the after #MeToo fallout very much in focus, well I have a true tale which I think throws up some interesting talking points.

Several weeks ago I was chatting to a young lad at work who said he’d been out drinking with three friends the evening before, turns out the sun was shining so all four were sat outside around a wooden table in the Pub’s garden…………. a very British pastime, every Public House will have it’s own small garden or terrace for patrons to enjoy.

So these four lads were quietly drinking beer at their table, all very civilised none were drunk or being rowdy or loud, they were I’m told chatting being sociable and having a laugh. All good fun and every so often a barmaid would visit their table for I guess empty glasses, take a bar food order or bring more drinks, then my friend tells me as the barmaid was leaning over their wooden table handing out pints of beer she said,

“Will you four stop trying to look down my blouse!”,

I’m age 52, and this scenario still happens to this day, and note the bottom left corner states this photo’s from the internet!!

He went on to give more clarity to his tale, she wasn’t p#ssed the lads and barmaid were on very friendly terms, their interactions were all proper and above board and I’d guess being as she was a barmaid and they were lads I’d guess there was plenty of flirting and light hearted banter, after she’d err told them to stop I’d guess knowing my work colleague there’d have been amused protestations such as,

😉 “WHAT me?” (His words). 

With ladles of wounded pride thrown in to good measure, and the way he shared his tale nothing more was said end of, certainly no Police were summoned or the Head Publican called to eject the lads from the premises, no the lady was quite aware they were peeking and for sure the lads were trying to glance down her open blouse…………….. I know for certain most men would!………. Now I realise ‘man hating lesbian feminists’ will disagree with what I am about to say,

“But don’t you think the barmaid handled the situation in exactly the right way?”

Btw I am also a feminist!

If she’d been getting increasingly tired of the lad’s furtive attention wasn’t warning the four 18yr teens enough? Yes the Pub garden is her very own workplace but there wasn’t any need to create a scene, the group and herself were all getting on fine, friendly and no doubt sexuality and the (adult) drinking atmosphere affected everyone’s behaviour, my friend saw the humour and the barmaid let it be known who was in charge……….. everyone had a giggle, the Pub didn’t lose four future paying customers and no scene or drama was created.

Ok I’d agree if you said my example of inappropriate behaviour is unique as every scenario will be, for one a drinking establishment barmaid won’t be any shrinking violet, she’d know exactly the right way to handle groups of leery lads who were overstepping the mark anyways you decide, I’ve met tiny barmaids who could eject fighting men just by a strength of personality.

Never argue with a p#ssed and angry woman, you’ll lose!!!

There of course could be an argument put forward by a certain British Police Commissioner that ladies should dress appropriately because short dresses can lead to unwanted attention, hmm who’s he blaming?

But I have a feeling the majority of right minded thinking adults agreed he was talking out of his arse and I’d hope his wife and daughters, if he had any, would have put him straight namely the fact a woman is assaulted isn’t her own fault, wear an open collared blouse if you wish AND I would add if a guy try’s to look down at your goodies, tell him to “get lost” or “please stop”.

And he will. Also.

If you’re in an underground train carriage and a guy attaches his grubby fingers to your ‘sweet lil ass’, tell him to “keep your hands to yourself!” And shout as loudly as you can so everyone else can hear you!

Confidence is key?

Okay I understand every case of sexual impropriety is different to another and further this blog isn’t a political platform only my own thoughts and observations, so what are mine?

For what it’s worth my own thoughts after hearing my colleagues Pub garden tale, was the barmaid handled herself correctly, the four decent hard working lads were warned and next time would hopefully be less obvious and take greater care when trying to look down a female’s open blouse!

No harm was done discuss!

Finally I’m here to say human beings are sexual animals, a woman will look at a man’s bulge in his trousers, a guy will look at a woman’s cleavage…………… you have to accept because that’s called ‘the way of the world’.

Early evening thoughts and now in comments tell me what you think please. 🤔

A. Shepherdson 2018

10 thoughts on “A woman’s Cleavage (a cautionary tale)

  1. Finally women are speaking up! But I wonder what would happen if the person looking down her blouse or up her skirt was her boss? And would she be fired if she said stop. I remember wearing high neck blouses to avoid those stares at work. And as a teacher young boys often stare because they’re curious. So dressing appropriately was key. But, from an early age we need to teach our boys that it’s not ok to stare. It makes girls feel uncomfortable. Think about this…, what if everywhere guys went women were assessing their package? They wouldn’t like that so Much I think. Especially if it was unwanted. Something to think about.

    Liked by 2 people

    • Something to think about indeed Lesley 🙂 and thank you for commenting.

      I will reply when I’ve given your comment a little thought, and will probably write a follow up post. All I will add is I try to be light hearted and entertain however you’ve introduced a very serious point regarding children.

      Thank you. Andrew 🙂


    • I applaud speaking up! 🙂 The barmaid spoke up, she warned the four lads their behaviour was unacceptable without making a scene, I’ll go further I’d guess if the peeking continued the next step would have been to inform the pub landlord her boss. But yes mine is a straightforward easily solvable scenario, whereas if a woman’s boss was ‘down blousing’ and the lady desperately needed to keep her job that boss is guilty of workplace bullying and abuse of position and power.

      Lesley being both a schoolteacher and mother I wholeheartedly agree children should be taught not to stare however I maintain the top photograph scenario is a rights of passage moment in any young boy or girls life, a sexual awakening and completely harmless and very different to actively trying to peek down a blouse. Incidentally a British upskirting law was passed just last month punishable with up to five years in prison……….. photographing up a lady’s skirt ALWAYS was and always will be completely unacceptable illegal behaviour, oh and a woman can gaze at my package for however long she wishes! 😀

      Thank you Lesley for a thought provoking reply ❤


  2. This reminds me of a funny true story. A buddy I know told me his wife worked at a coffee shop, and I went there for coffee anyway so I thought I would say hello and introduce myself. I knew her name and so I went to the shop, got coffee and introduced myself.
    Later he told me his wife told him I was looking at her chest, (she was wearing a high collar shirt so not a cleavage situation). I told him of course!, I was looking for her name, and that’s where all the girls pin their name tags!

    Liked by 2 people

  3. Wow, what a loaded topic, right?! Where does one start?! I agree with a lot of what the woman at the top says and I agree with a lot of what the guys say. There’s boundaries that shouldn’t be crossed, especially with bosses, basic propriety to observe, and maybe even not wearing plunging blouses to work is smart too. The barmaid, I think, did handle things nicely.
    But in the end, it kinda does boil down to biology and evolution…doesn’t it?
    You can’t stop the eyes from looking, seeing, the brain from being attracted. It’s not a sin. It’s not a bad thing. And as you say above–women do it too. It’s just that men have traditionally had the *power* to take advantage, and worse, actual physical strength to impose their will.
    So I think the recent “boundaries” that have been applied and discussions everyone’s having are important, but only to a certain point, and unfortunately, I think we’ve gone beyond that point.
    We’ve gone way too far the other way, don’t you think?
    Where’s the middle ground?
    Maybe we have to go through this kind of tortuous tunnel of reactionary strictness and no leniency for anything–I heard that some people are actually offended if a waiter comes over to a table full of men and women and says, “Hey, guys, who wants drinks?”–so that the more dangerous lessons of stalking and serious potential problems at work and rape, of course, do become activities people are much less inclined to take part in since the stakes/consequences are much higher, and then things will even out eventually to a guy being able to compliment a woman on her dress (not leeringly, just pleasantly) without being taken to court.
    And don’t forget–there’s a double standard against men. Whenever they complain about harassment, domestic violence, even sometimes rape, they’re just laughed out of the room essentially. Maybe THAT conversation will come after the women get sorted out, lol !!
    Thanks for tackling this topic.
    Very few do!
    But we have to keep talking about it, don’t we? 🙂 🙂

    Liked by 1 person

    • Again thank you, I’ve enjoyed reading your reply many times and wow SO many issues to reflect upon.

      You have defined the birth of the MeToo movement beautifully as highlighted by abusers such as Harvey Weinstein, ‘men have tradionally had the power to take advantage’ and shamefully many have! Narcissistic bullies have overstepped those recognised ‘boundaries’, however I’d suggest collectively ALL men have taken advantage to some degree but it’s only this past decade we’ve begun to appreciate what is and what isn’t acceptable behaviour, as you say boundaries are forever changing and 😀 speaking as a red blooded guy, dipping ‘ones hand inside the sweetie jar will always a temptation’, after all many workplace friendships end in marriage! Andrew.

      Liked by 1 person

  4. Hahaha. Thanks for responding to my treatise, Andrew. I didn’t mean to hijack the conversation, but it’s one I hold strong opinions on, a lot of which MeToo probably wouldn’t agree with. But I feel like it’s the same argument as vegan vs meat eater, you know? We evolved to require protein. We evolved to be attracted to each other. The problems arise with how those needs/desires are met and can we improve the ways? Yeah, of course. And yeah, I know at least two people who met at work and tied the knot, ha ha. So there it is! SB

    Liked by 1 person

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