Oh and the hair is but a distant memory (sigh) 😀 , back in the 1970s I was always making things from old scraps of wood so was I taught to be creative or inherited the skills through my genes?…………… Happy days! 😀 And back in the days of my youth pram wheels were childhood currency, if you had them some kid would always buy or exchange for a swap……….. I’m wondering do children play like this in 2018 or am I looking at my past through rose coloured spectacles?
Anyways chatting about ‘meee’ isn’t necessarily the point to this post.
My mother is a perfectionist she can turn her hand to almost anything, as a small child I remember her sitting at the dining room table, cutting out material for dresses, shortening curtains by sewing machine and taking the hem up on my Jeans because she could never buy…………….. LOL long story!!! Most evenings leading up to Christmas she’d be baking mince pies, cooking a fruit cake, icing when cool with brilliant white sugar solution then leaving on the dining room bureau to dry. My mother used to make everything and anything before arthritis took hold of her hands (they’re not so bad which is a blessing but sewing is a hobby of the past), and only just recently she helped me assemble a bathroom cabinet holding it up while I drilled screwed and attached to the wall……….. yep a lovely family anecdote to put down in writing.
Ah where was I? Oh yes crafting a response post to a lady blogger I follow, about the age of nine and for some unknown long forgotten reason I had to make from scratch a small ‘sitting stool’ from oddments of timber. You know the scenario, this crafting project was a task to be completed earning me a badge from my Cub Scout leader, successful and mum would later sew onto my arm. The point to my tale is I guess mum could have left me to my own devices, and yes I could would have presented a half decent chair to my Cub Scout leader, earned the badge because well I was good with my hands and now I’m a time served engineer by trade.
Anyways rather than leaving me to work on my own, mum helped with the measuring cutting drilling screwing together before trusting me with a tin of brilliant white gloss paint!…………… And measuring each small piece of timber is the key to my tale, the dimensions had to be marked with a pencil then cut to a line, left to myself I’d have used rule of thumb and yes as I remember the ‘sitting stool’ EXACTLY resembled the picture on the plans……… even if I say it myself the stool looked pretty darn spectacular with its shiny paint drying under bright sunlight.
As an aside after the presentation ceremony, unbelievably one rather catty bitchy mouthed mother had the nerve to criticise mum saying,
“I don’t agree with parents doing the children’s work for them!” (Mum let it pass!)
Ffs I physically made it! Mum just instructed me how to use tools properly and to this day I still live and work by the mantra measure twice and cut once, and yes still to this day there are occasions when in a rush to get tasks done the initial first measurement turns out to be wrong…………. don’t you think that bitchy mother was out of order? I guess some parents compete against other parents through their offspring and it gets outer hand, anyways very childish behaviour but there you.
So what’s the point to my tale? We all have childhood memories experiences which only when many years later as adults ourselves do we realise shaped our lives, to this day I can close my eyes and picture us two knelt on the concrete front drive with tools and oddments of wood scattered around about us, I guess some would use the word bonding though I’m not so sure? To me our labours were more an exercise in how things should be done correctly, and yes on reflection the anecdote is a happy childhood memory which perhaps I’ll appreciate even more in years to come……… sadly.
I’m employed as an engineer so perhaps her early construction lessons rubbed off?
The amusing part to this tale is knowing my mother as a person I’d guess she was herself competed against other parents, however note she was very careful NOT to make the ‘sitting stool’ for me (btw I’ve asked mum and she cannot remember what happened to it), yes a competitive parent but cheating to win an award wasn’t and isn’t her style!
So my message to the blogger I’m responding to, don’t worry about the mess, the child is crafting and baking but life skills are being learnt, I’d guess treasured memories are being locked away for future reference and at least the child isn’t staring at a screen zombie like watching TV.
(I realise part two of my recent visit to a heritage steam railway is a little late, it’s a photo blog so nothing tooo heavy but better late than never? Anyways reading part one really will help you understand the narrative of this evening’s post. 🙂 My take is enjoy the photos of a very unique British tourist attraction.)
Below Toddington Station and a very typical railway platform scene, I travel British railway of today and I cannot remember seeing flowering hanging baskets……….. again arranged by volunteer enthusiasts God love them oh and the homemade cakes were lovely.
Below I’d guess this is how a 1940’s railway waiting room would have appeared, a telephone manufactured from Bakelite and a coal burning fireplace to heat the room in winter.
Below photographs taken from within the carriage I was travelling in, yet again built 1940’s with wooden panelling and extremely comfortable it was to! Incidentally heated via steam pipes from the err steam engine!
Below our locomotive taking on water a common sight on all steam railways of the era.
In light of present day terrorist atrocities blighting every town and city across the globe, my photos below just show how times have changed with these piles of unattended suit cases laying unattended on a platform, I would add this scene is far from being staged for a camera! Watch any black and white movie of the era and this is what you will see stacks of luggage!……….. A security nightmare if ever you saw one.
The heritage railway also has vehicles owned by the train Company on display with the lorry below left painted in GWR dark brown and cream livery……… incidentally I’d never seen a three wheel truck before.
Now for two photographs (below) taken by me gazing out the window at the countryside gently rolling past……….. if you are interested the County is Gloucestershire.
……………. and finally the Railway is also home to heritage diesel locomotives circa 1960’s and my opinion JUST as important to save for future generations to enjoy and travel on.
A reflective post this evening discussing the differences between the childhood era I grew up in as compared to youth culture of today……….. we’re talking computer games! Oh and keep in mind I AM a cheerful ‘live your life as you wish’ kind of guy, remember this whilst you’re reading. TY 🙂
Note I’m not having a go at young people, I do understand computer games are more than just play to today’s children unlike in my youth when I was outside riding my bike or constructing go carts from old timber AND (stolen) pram wheels………… but I get it! Gaming’s socialising, it’s what kids do in 2018.
I get that gaming is an important part of youth culture, a time for children to bond with their friends whilst playing on XBOX’s but they do seem an awful time waster. AND I’m not alone, I chat to a Grandfather colleague at work and he has one hell of a difficult time getting his 10 year old grandson to put down these addictive consoles that will keep him engrossed and quiet for hours if allowed to. His Grandad wins after much good natured persuading and then they’ll bond going fishing on their bikes, and I use the word addictive as a description because yes computer games are designed by games inventers to be as addictive as any drug.
Am I wrong of course not, these clever games inventers understand exactly how a child’s brain is wired, visual graphics, high octane action plenty of age appropriate gun violence and of course achievable goals, if you concentrate and learn then you’ll reach another level to…………… err who knows where? Win and you get……………… nothing? But yes I concede the point to gaming is enjoying the moment with friends……. I get it.
Do you recall my opening line, I’m not having a go at the youth of today? Well you’ll be pleased to know I’m not, I’m speaking of course as an out of touch older generation, “Gaming is brilliant fun” some little people say to me and I understand I’m out of touch, but then I think back to my youth and I hear my mother’s exasperated voice saying,
“Will you turn that TV off………….. please”, “go outside and ride your bike…………… please!”
And yes thinking back my sibling and I would watch trash TV at any given opportunity because ‘tech with graphics’ is addictive to a child’s brain, the only problem is I would be watching mind numbing cartoon series to badly acted Aussie soaps all afternoon! Crap TV which leaves the viewer in some ridiculous cliff hanger so I have to watch the next episode to see what happens next!
And nothing ever did apart from I’d wasted my life!
I was of course addicted to this blessed rubbish, jeeze when I think back to the hours of my youth I’ve wasted watching American sitcoms Coronation Street and EastEnders! But I’ll share a secret, I’m a changed man I haven’t sat through an episode of BBC’s EastEnders in the last 25 years, and if I do ever catch an episode’s trailer I’ll just shake my head at all the disgusting arguing shouting and fighting.
Would you believe I used to rush home from Scouts to watch this crap?
So yes I should cut the youth of today some slack, time to time I observe two little people playing games with friends in the living room and yes they are socialising, forming strategic friendships to kill an enemy, they’re arguing, there’ll be tears and laughter but the children are happy and having fun so reluctantly I have to admit gaming’s okay in moderation………… just not for me. I was exactly the same at their age although addicted to a whole different outlet of electronic media………….. so reluctantly YES I’ll admit computer gaming is a good thing in moderation.
Only when you’re older and ‘wiser’ do you realise how precious those childhood years actually were, there’ll come a time when teenage boys and girls will switch off their consoles, put the handsets in a draw and go out dancing with their friends. Then again if you meet two girls like the couple above, well all I can say is I wish computer games were around when I was a young man!…………. she’s even playing wearing a pink bikini for heavens sake ❤ !
See I told you I wasn’t ‘having a go!’ Incidentally a very British phrase, writing’s a great way to work through your prejudices.
We ALL listen into stranger’s conversations………… don’t we?
I am a people watcher by nature, I was going to write aren’t we all? But I know for a fact some people are so self absorbed they are oblivious to what goes on around them, perhaps a little unfair of me. So yes guilty as charged I can’t help watching people go about their normal lives, nothing creepy mind it’s just that if you find human nature fascinating well you have to observe! Oh and I should qualify that statement with I have a terrible habit for eavesdropping, perhaps an unsavoury character trait but if you’re going to chat to your friend about sexually transmitted diseases, then what’s a guy to do except listen in?
I really can’t help myself however I’m far from blameless in fact I blame this new phenomenon of telling the world your private business fairly and squarely on mobile phones! I can stand next to someone in a bus queue and they’ll happily chat about their lives to a friend consequently I’ve become very attuned to conversations going on around me, and I’ve heard some corkers when sitting on the bus enduring the awful evening commute out of Oxford. But what’s to do? For some unknown reason people seem totally comfortable having intimate mobile phone conversations out loud, however the eavesdropper only hears half the conversation so has to fill in the pauses while the other person answers, but don’t you think eavesdropping is just human nature?
(I’m not a gossip though, oh no tell me a secret in confidence and my lips are sealed)
Recently I overheard a lady explaining to a friend on the phone, how she’d just left a solicitor’s office after a meeting with her ex husband, a guy she described in these glowing terms,
“Thankfully I’ll never have to see his stupid little face ever again”, you get the idea they were divorcing.
I should add the half of the conversation I was listening to was the lady gleefully taking her ex hubby to the proverbial cleaners, the alimony, the furniture, the house she got the lot! Although she had to give him a token lump sum, and by the time she’d hung up I both felt sorry for the poor guy and thanked my lucky stars I am single! Mind you she had a pleasant well spoken voice and a personality you could call ‘bitchy’ but then again she was divorcing an ex hubby so perhaps her attitude was understandable……………….. 😀 hmm do I really want to ever marry?
I’ve lost count of the shear number of Court case conversations I’ve eavesdropped on, you see our County’s Crown Court (second highest Court in the land) resides in the city I commute out of, consequently all I can imagine is people leaving Court at 4pm are SO excited and intellectually stimulated, or are so frigging relieved, they jump on the bus, whip out their mobile and tell friends mothers or girlfriends what went on in Court and the outcome of the case, and again I fill in the gaps. I’ve overheard defendants discuss their knife crimes, wounding, robbery convictions and often accompanied with foul language, not forgetting drug abuse and all absolutely staggering conversations so much more entertaining than reading tabloid newspapers, or soap operas on the TV (I don’t watch TV!) Btw I’m not joking the stories I have heard!!
I’ve also overheard conversations that are so sad and upsetting, bare in mind they’re impossible not to overhear, perhaps when someone sits in their comfy Italian leather reclining seat they’re totally aware the person in the seat behind can hear every word? The other week a young woman from the seat in front of me was chatting to her mother in tears, letting her heart out as daughters do explaining how she could no longer afford the mortgage payments on her house and other bills, and by the time I’d descended the double decker stairs to get off believe me when I tell you 20minutes of sadness and upset had left me in bits. I almost felt like giving the young lady a gift of money (but is that patronising to admit), I’ve even felt guilty that I am lucky to be relatively well off!
I don’t know some people seem do get the rough end of life, so far I haven’t, but I’m afraid I’m unsure I could emotionally handle having my life turned upside down? Perhaps the consequence for my timidity is I’m a guy who doesn’t take a risk……. is still single…… a little unhappy lol.
The most entertaining eavesdrop I’ve had by far lol was again sitting on a bus! A jaw dropping tale where the girl behind who was retelling lurid stories of her slutty behaviour while being on holiday with friends in some Spanish holiday resort, fabulously entertaining that was! You’ll get the gist when I say she was a ‘sleep all day, drink party and sex all night girl’, well turns out she’d slept with a different guy every SINGLE night, good for her, you’re a long time dead!
Jeeze I was so envious………… why didn’t I go to Spain in my twenties? 😀
(Btw I’ll skip the conversation where three girls were comparing their shopping purchases and discussing the pitfalls of wearing bras that are tooo small……………….. honestly I ask you!!! And just the other week the girl sitting next to me was regaling tales of her first leg waxing session to her friend………….. after five minutes or so I had to turn and look at her, I smiled with raised eyebrows, she went red and her friend couldn’t stop laughing………….. either I’ve never noticed this before or times have changed and I’m getting old?)
Oh yes back to the entertaining eavesdrop!
Well on another journey home two teenage (@15) girls were seated across the aisle on the other side of the bus, a row in front of me, and suddenly my attention was pricked so to speak because the two young ladies were chatting about relationships and sex, oh and loudly with plenty of passengers within earshot. Well as you can imagine I’m listening into the conversation and I’d guess all the other commuters would have turned down their mp3 media, stopped reading their paperback novels all ears drawn to the girl’s sex talk. Then mid chatting about their love lives, one girl earnestly said to her friend and I could tell she was rather concerned worried and confused, saying in hushed tones,
“Can you catch STD’s from sleeping with another woman?”
Well I’m all frigging ears mulling over questions like ‘well can a woman catch an STD from sex with another woman?’ ‘And if so which ones?’ And I must admit I was as confused as the two girls! Well to cut a short story even shorter, her friend wasn’t much help and didn’t seem to know?
Then all of a sudden a middle age woman sitting a few rows in front of me, turned around from her seat, leant across to the two girls and answered,
“Yes you can my dear, you can catch STD’s.”
And having shared her caring advice she returned to her seat as if nothing had ever happened, then the worried girl turned to her friend and rather seriously said,
“I’d better get myself checked out then” and with that their conversation stopped or changed subject I cannot remember?………….. Hmm I wonder if she did get checked or have an STI.
Well as you can imagine I was in my element listening in (wouldn’t you be? Btw we all were), however I couldn’t help wondering who the rather brave knowledgeable helpful woman was? I remember thinking she must be a lovely person to bravely come to the rescue of a troubled teenager, perhaps she was a mother with daughters? A school teacher? Or just an example of someone with such great empathy, devoid of embarrassment, that she could no longer remain quiet knowing both the correct STI answer and how important the teenagers understood diseases are exchanged skin to skin.
I was truly touched.
I wouldn’t have had the nerve to speak up possibly because I was pretty confused myself! My brain was listing any number of sexual diseases before settling on Genital Herpes, I’m reliably informed Herpes is very easy to pick up from skin to skin sexual contact, but either way I wouldn’t have had the nerve to pipe up and neither did all the other commuters within earshot…………. hmm perhaps men should never get involved #MeToo and all that.
In life there are those who get involved and help others, and there are those who watch and do nothing? So I’m left wondering which one am I?
(Stating the obvious boys talk loudly over their mobile phones………………. but for some reason I only remember lurid tales told by young ladies 😀 probably because lady’s conversations are FAR more interesting engaging and darn right entertaining!)
Now I have an admission to make (lol said that before!) I began writing this post 14/03/2018 and it’s resided in Draft form ever since, perhaps the reason I didn’t get around to posting is Princess Anya isn’t so much a blog, but more a writing exercise that you could say is themed ‘my take on chatrooms’ .
So what’s to do with this tenuously adult themed tale? Do I publish it? or do I bin it? hmm after much thought I’ve decided to publish and in all honesty I enjoyed reading this tale once again. 🙂
Don’t you think Anya (cartoon replaced photo) could be mistaken for the girl next door? Demure classy intellectual, a college student perhaps? But how wrong you are! Oh so wrong!
As often happens with my WordPress I’ll tack (nautically) from one questionable opinion to the next because they’re enjoyable to write 🙂 , so be aware I’m going to explain why once in a while I’ll watch a certain lady perform in her chatroom! Btw she’s age20 and it’s all legal proper and above board. 🙂
Tell you what! Call this post an antidote to my ‘Crime and Punishment’ tale, and a lot more fun. 🙂
I’ll be totally honest with you and say I dislike watching pornography, (that may surprise one or two regular readers lol) but take note I’m not admitting a dislike of watching porn to gain favour with you lovely readers, and I have no real objection against mentally well balanced adults accessing legal consensually performed pornography, only that watching two naked porn actors going at it like rabbits bores me to frigging tears………….. I prefer doing ‘it’ with consenting 18+ live human beings, most of you will be in relationships and isn’t intimacy connection and a meeting of souls? Far more fun!
Btw this post ISN’T discussing the pros and cons arguments for and against legal pornography, only that watching sex bores me frigging rigid, and yes I’ve changed my moral position to thinking Governments should do all they possibly can to stop children having access to imagery they just don’t understand. (Phew that’s a mouthful)……………….. I don’t have children but I have several relatives who ‘have their own little people!’
So yes I’ll admit to watching the odd adult movie in my lifetime!
A short tale for you! When aged 18 myself and a group of 30 apprentices visited Oxford’s Odeon Cinema in George Street, a very very late viewing mind, to watch a soft porn adaptation of Cinderella, I’ll say NO more except imagine a scantily clothed nubile pretty virginal Snow White, then think seven horny dwarfs, use your imaginations and yes you’ve guessed correct!
Was our ‘soft’ movie worth watching? Yes and no, yes because going out of an evening with fabulous young men were some of the happiest days of my life, the comradery you experience with like minded friends you just cannot put a price on. And no, because the pornography was far from sexy, in fact the ‘plot’ was ridiculous to the point of being hilarious and how she managed position 69 without putting her back out I’ll never know.
Enough of unorthodox fairy tales.
So who is Princess Anya (the lady in the picture)? She is in fact a very VERY successful adult chatroom actress, I’d describe her a classy sensual very much ‘girl next door’ young woman oh and of Indian descent. AND if you’re at all curious I don’t hold the view male paying viewers to her shows are sad old perverts, no! They’re probably decent single guys (mostly), loners or society’s lonely where the internet could be their social life.
Where do I fit into this alternative cyber world of sexual fantasies? Once in a while I’ll pull down the favourites drop down tab on my laptop, where I’ve bookmarked a legal and regulated non spammy secure and safe well known adult website. I’ll fill you in with a little detail, just enough because WordPress may be reading, imagine pages of hundreds of scantily clad young women sitting in a room in their home, any room, in front of a webcam and ‘stripping naked’. Yes you’re there!
Lol I’m one of life’s observers, yes the young women are gorgeous, btw I don’t visit that often note! The girls 18+ are stunning and yes remember masturbation is medically good for one’s mental wellbeing, all good clean fun, but it’s the chat logs on the right hand side that can be addictive viewing full of amusing and intelligent banter and passes ten minutes or so…….. and 😉 what guy doesn’t like watching gorgeous young women undressing, well at least I’m honest!
However I never pay because I’m tight with money.
The male viewers have usernames (note I’m not a member), it’s a chatroom and you know how chatrooms work, they anonymously write a comment, sometimes very funny because they are articulate intelligent men, she’ll laugh reply be playful and a friendship of sorts is struck up. Yes Anya is stringing them along a little, she’s being cheery funny sensual to gain favour and get paid tokens but their conversation surprisingly isn’t disgusting it’s actually entertaining viewing.
Btw virtual tokens are purchased with real money, ‘punished plastic’ if you get my meaning!
Time to time moderators enter the chatroom to check on the appropriateness of behaviour, if some hate writing bully chimes with obscenities the lady blocks him, and by the time Anya has 10,000 men close to uhmm a state of nearing sexual excitement (going by the frenzied chat log), Anya switches Private allowing those who’ve paid $5 in tokens to watch her private performance.
The screen the goes blank, and the room is Private!
And because I’m tight fisted miser I don’t pay to watch, then for the next 15 minutes Anya puts on a masturbation show, is she wrong and disgusting? You decide. And how do I know what goes on in her show? We’ll for one I’m an intelligent guy with an awesomeimagination and two because the viewers continue to write a chat log on the right hand side! And interesting entertaining reading it is to with the guys writing whilst watching Anya’s private performance, and remember these guys are wordsmiths of a sort, articulate and witty, they carry on writing a running commentary of Anya’s bedroom antics positions and use of toys AND the are respectful…………….. Jeeze lol use your imaginations please!! And for those of who you who are a little prim and proper look away now, as Anya performs I’d guess hundreds of men are sat in front of their computer screens watching and w##king.
So what do I make of all these sexy shenanigans? I have absolutely no problem with adult performers and their chatrooms apart from one overriding essentially important caveat, legal moderated chatrooms are fine as long as they cannot be accessed by children.
Goes without saying I’m a moral mentally well balanced good hearted human being soviewing would be fine, and if you could 100% guarantee ALL children cannot access regulated chatrooms on the internet, then I honestly have no problem but again banning pornography is your own moral choice to make. However back in the real world we know children unfortunately do watch, and I guess me saying chatrooms are ok is a pact with the devil if EVER there was one.
I have a relative with little people of his/her own, work it out lol, he/she has parental locks set on all their children’s media devices, flagged up sexual words will filter out inappropriate websites, setting preferences will stop their children seeing unwanted sexual images, they have their own phones but the deal/pact with Mum and Dad is at any time of the adult’s choosing they can take an iPad or phone off the little person and examine their browsing history.
The family pact also states, if preferences and locks have been tampered with, adult web addresses attempted then the device is confiscated and ‘the little people’ are fine with this pact, they also learn that life has rules and consequences and they haven’t reneged on the deal although email has been disabled for non sexual related incidents. The ‘little people’ are learning to be responsible! I’ll finish by saying the parental pact works because the adults in question are intelligent, clever, caring and responsible alas not every parent is either tech savvy or actually cares.
As for beautiful Princess Anya, she is one talented lady oh yes she is a VERY clever young woman (possibly the most shapely firm perky tits I’ve ever seen!) And her bedroom antics are pretty amazing (apparently remember I don’t pay to watch) but more importantly Anya is a bubbly witty playful personable intelligent young woman, she’s a friend to lonely men and her finely crafted skilfully honed feminine charms will seldom be bettered.
I watch her interacting with viewers, observe, listen and read her chat log and I’m convinced she’s a woman who could hold any audience in the palm of her hand, her skillset is exactly the same as any TV evangelist preacher except Anya’s not extorting money from penniless congregations who can ill afford it (she’s not lying to them either). I’d say she is a more honest human being, men pay for her adult service and she gives them what they want, I’d suggest Anya’s a morally genuine person more so than any Politician working in British politics, actually I’m convinced. Hmm perhaps one day she venture into politics, she could, it happens.
So she takes her clothes off for money, who cares? Are her talents wasted? Yes, but she appears to be having fun and making money and I’m ok with anyone living the life they wish as long as it hurts no one.
Now I move onto Patti, she’s a whole different woman all together, age 40 and quite probably a mother herself and again she strips for money! Several years ago I watched a TV program investigating the murky world of strip bars, and interestingly many of the young women were single mothers……………….. judge people at your peril.
Patti is fabulous, I like Patti, she’s your mate’s Auntie or your mum’s best friend lol the dictionary definition of MILF, and to look at her sitting in her kitchen you wouldn’t have guessed she was a sex worker of sorts, unless I’d told you! However the absence of a bra, unfettered large boobs underneath a tight fitting tee shirt kinda gives her job away. Once again when she’s been payed enough well earnt tokens, off come the clothes and Patti ‘performs’ in front of her kitchen sink! And no NO I’m not linking the website.
So now to the question you are ALL hopefully asking, how much money does Anya make performing a 2 hour show? Remember 1hr 45 minutes is chatting and interacting with male viewers, getting them excited, clean chat with no demands bullying or hate, then she’ll set Private, hundreds of $5 tokens will pile in and doing the quick Math I think she made $700 for a 15 minute strip show.
Just imagine $350/hr………….. several times a day! (Most girls won’t earn this)
I should finish by saying I make no personal judgements, Anya is a wealthy young woman, empowered, self employed, she hurts no one so good for her and knowing the direction society is morally taking us, I have a feeling any future mainstream employers won’t care less anyway. Further still I’d guess many of the other performers will be single mothers, and all will be earning money to feed themselves, pay the bills so why not dance naked at least they’re not degrading themselves in porn flicks!
One day I’ll have to pay and watch Anya perform naked with toys, captured by various camera angles with her legs akimbo, trouble is that means spending $5 and I’m as tight as #ssholes. 😀 then again she is beautiful.
One final thought, the question crosses my mind would I want a daughter to perform in chatrooms and the answer has to be no, but if a friend or sister wanted to strip naked on the internet for money (consensually and over age18) then I’d be cool, her life her body I make no moral judgements!
(Original to March 2018, btw I have @ ten more posts in draft…………… I’m feeling a little glum this evening, these wordy essays aren’t what you’d define as blogging)
Mildly adult themed (been a while since I’ve written an adult true tale) and hopefully a fun read!
Now a message for any ‘classy ladies’ who may have read my post title and presumed ‘moi’ has written a tale about two people who fell in love and lived happily ever after, or maybe they’re imagining this is ‘moi’ reviewing a movie newly released at the cinema……… well if you did I’m afraid you’re wrong on both counts, which only leaves a third choice which one hundred percent of men will understand………….. having said all that medical doctors tell us masturbation (had you guessed) is the safest form of sex and more important good for one’s mental health and general well being………… and being serious for a second (for this is a serious post) I wholeheartedly agree pleasuring oneself lifts the spirits leaving you feeling satisfied and relaxed.
Incidentally Urban Dictionary defines ‘Happy Ending’ thus : ‘When a masseuse feels inclined to finish your session with oral sex or manual release’…………… and forget the word inclined that’s what I frigging paid her to do!
Btw my tale for you this evening is themed just for fun 🙂 .
One blustery autumn afternoon in late September, a few weeks ago now! You’d have found me laying naked on my back, not a stitch of clothing on my body, my legs wide apart and a Romanian lady by the name of ‘Dana’ kneeling before me, a truly beautiful gorgeous lady gazing down upon me, a delicious wicked smile across her face oh and the reddest glossiest lipstick you ever did see.
“Do you enjoy giving gentleman hand relief?” I enquired,
and when you ‘come’ to think of it massaging a male client’s back muscles with dextrous skilful fingertips, finishing the massage with one hand gently curled around his erection and gently rolling his testicles between thumb and finger with the other, has to be one of the strangest occupations ever!
“Yes I do honey”, Dana answered with a wicked grin, her lubricated right hand rhythmically stroking my love length and circling my purple helmet with warming palms, the joyous tingles and pleasurable sensations coursing from the tip of my penis down to my groin are near indescribable………… only men understand how gorgeous and beautiful those stimulated nerve endings alter his mind, his breath quickens, his hardness bucks and pulses as he draws ever closer to climax.
I once gleaned from secretive Dana where she’d learnt her gift for massage with an erotic twist from? She said after arriving in Britain as an economic migrant, earning money to pay for a deposit on land back in her native Romanian village, she first stayed with a friend in Birmingham but had no job, no income! Then one day her flatmate suggest they both rent a bedroom, advertise ‘certain services’ on an adult website, both working giving intimate Swedish massages…………. massage ‘services’ you’ll not find on your average Town’s High Street.
Well fast forward her tale several years and Dana rented a bottom floor box bedroom within a back street terraced house in a part of Oxford, a place where you’ll not leave your car unattended………….. put it this way if you did, your car wouldn’t be there when you returned!!!
I’d better shorten my winding complicated tale because you all lead busy lives, just understand whilst surfing the net one evening I happened across this LEGAL adult website giving intimate massages, phoned the mobile number hoping I was speaking to the lady in the photographs and well I became her 4 o’clock afternoon appointment that same day.
You’ll all know by now I’m an honest guy, well the website is legal, the ladies are over age 18 and working independently of their own accord and incidentally Dana stresses she gives no sexual services………… which means neither penetration or felatio……… shame really because as I gazed into her eyes I didn’t half fancy a blowjob!
Well I travelled by bus to Oxford, found my way to the given name of the street, texted her for the house number at 3.55pm, then upon reaching the address told her my name through the intercom beside the front door. A buzzing sound came from said door lock and there standing in the hallway was one of the most beautiful young ladies I have ever seen in my life, slim gorgeous with a beautiful smile and warm becoming blue eyes.
I introduced myself and yes she was even more beautiful than her photos suggested, then followed her through one of the many doors into a dimly lit warm and cosy bedroom………..virtually absent of furniture other than a single bed with duvet, centrally heated, carpeted, very clean and extremely tasteful.
I handed Dana the advertised price and then stood there near speechless looking like a complete and utter lemon wondering what to do next? Until she said,
“Well take your clothes off!”
“All of them?” I rather lamely answered she must have though ‘Jesus I’ve a right one here!’
“Yes all of them honey” she said laughing now, “then take a shower” glancing past me toward an even SMALLER side room (wardrobe) no bigger than a shower cubicle………… err that’s what the cupboard was!
So, and writing here and now this anecdote still makes me laugh, Dana stood there in her fishnet stockings, latex high waisted tight fitting hot pants (no knickers hold that thought!) also a black padded bra revealing two of the most exquisitely shaped high round breasts you ever did see, I’m still smiling because this lady I’d known for sixty seconds stood but a metre close to me inside this tiny bedroom, and I near felt her burning gaze as I slipped down my boxer shorts, I glanced up and yes she was appraising my ‘bits and pieces’ ………… now just be aware I’m a clean bunny who was freshly showered wearing clean underwear, but as instructed I took a shower after being handed a fluffy soft towel.
(Why are Hotel towels always white?)
I should admit at this point Dana’s isn’t the first intimate masseuse I’ve had the pleasure of meeting, one time several years ago I had a finger in the ass prostate tickle but as the days past afterward, I decided the service wasn’t for me…………… yes one for the bucket list but I didn’t enjoy it!
I know I said ‘cutting a long story short’, well now I’m laying naked on her bed face down, a clean towel spread lengthways along the spongy quilt, arms down by my side then Dana places herself sitting on the tops of my legs, her two thighs either side my own and truth be told in a VERY firm vice like grip. Both Dana and I now comfortable I hear her squirt massaging oils into one hand from a bottle, then she began to push her hands deep into the small of my back, gliding them along my spine around my shoulders and all I can say is if you’ve never experienced warm skilful fingers work their magic on tired tight muscles, especially around the shoulders, if you haven’t then omg you haven’t lived! I will add Dana finger’s kneaded pushed and pulled tense muscles but not to worry she brought a true tingling warmth into my skin…………. btw I felt fabulous afterward!
And all the while we chatted about BREXIT, yes you did read right, she’s a working migrant from Romania! I talked about my family, we discussed Oxford architecture and I soon discovered Dana was witty personable friendly qualities you ascertain within minutes of meeting someone new, Dana is an intelligent young lady, then after 15 glorious minutes had passed rather abruptly she said,
“Now turn over!” Having first moved to one side,
followed by a firmly spoken, “spread your legs wide!”
Dutifully I ‘widened’ presenting my bits and pieces in what was a rather precarious position, with Dana finally sitting her bum on her thighs kneeling close between them, and omg you just have to know this goddess of a lady was so beautiful with the prettiest sweetest smile you ever did see……………. and a wicked gleam in her eyes! Like I said she enjoyed jerking men off, maybe the thrill for her was being in control and dominating a man, or perhaps giving hand relief is just a fun way to pay the gas bill? Either way it’s times like these that I’ve never felt more alive.
Dana now wearing a pair of delicate latex gloves from a box, slips them on, cups my testicle sack with the palm of her left hand and curls lubricated fingers around the shaft of my penis with the other, oh and I forgot to add I’ve rarely been so hard erect and engorged before. I’d guess staring at her gorgeous boobs and plunging cleavage was the reason for that…….. oh as for knowing she wore no knickers! Well put it this way slightly parted thighs and tightly fitting hotpants revealed all!!
I should say at this point do I really need to graphically explain the process of hand relief? Men of course understand the ‘process’ and I’d guess all women have serviced a partner, anyways all I will add is Dana possessed a skilful technique she described as luxurious (it was!) Well she worked her dextrous magic, my penis bucking as I’m brought to climax then bingo she directs a stream of warm semen across my stomach……………. any men reading appreciate the joyous heavenly pleasure.
(And with boobs as exquisite as those two you’ll appreciate I even impressed myself!)
So there you are the Swedish massage with intimate ‘happy ending’, and for any ladies reading all I can say is if you’re in search of a well paid fun occupation, you could do worse than train as a masseuse…………….. oh and I forgot to say Dana’s Birmingham flatmate gave her the confidence and now she gives ‘happy endings’ for a living!!!
Several days ago I posted photos of myself and Holly the ‘cross collie’ (our family’s pet dog), both out walking together in the Windrush Valley, the title is ‘see if you can spot the collie dog ‘ and if you click the link you’ll see my photos and incidentally a post I’m very pleased with.
Now that you’ve hopefully returned, I also filmed a brief mp4 of the two of us and uploaded onto my (rarely viewed) YouTube Channel which I’ll share below. Oh and apologies if you thought I sounded worse for drink…………… I’m not! I narrate like this when I’m concentrating 🙂 .
I have an ADMISSION to make (lol all very dramatic), I wrote this Post way back in, err ‘History’ informs me the date was ‘April 13th’, yes 6 months ago! Well eversince then it’s been in Draft form and short story I reread yesterday and thought why not publish! Thoughtful and yes wordy but I enjoyed creating and that’s why we’re here 🙂 .
An observational brain-teaser of a post for you this evening and perhaps a little over the place but not to worry 🙂 so lol if you’re struggling with my stream of consciousness (wittering’s) keep in mind how wonderful the human brain is! Lol it helps.
Many years ago I heard a rather memorable saying, by chance mind, possibly off the telly who knows? I cannot remember the context or who said it and why, only that I remember this saying still to this day……………….. so lol do you wish to know what it is?
If you’d rather not, click away from this post right now! 😦
Oh you’re still here fabulous. I’m glad because I think my phrase is conceptually a fascinating saying for many many reasons, so here we go accompanied by an imaginary virtual drum roll! Jeeze lol I hope I haven’t built this moment tooo much, not to worry oh and the saying is more of a question where you fill in the answers……………….. possibly several or different from my own?
‘What are the three most beautiful sights to behold in all of creation?’ (I know a real mouthful!) Answer ‘a sleeping Baby, a running Horse and a naked Woman.’
So can you better these?
A sleeping Baby
A running Horse
…………… and a naked Woman.
Don’t you agree all 3 images are gorgeous on the eye? Especially the ‘naked’ woman I think she is quite stunning although the Artist escapes me. (As an aside I go to bed at night naked, doctors say it’s healthier 😀 )
Throughout history all the great artists have painted the female nude, perhaps you’ve the opinion God surpassed himself on that day of creation, I know I’m beside myself with joyous incredulity watching a sex partner take her bra and panties off! And the baby and horse come close.
Where was I? 😀 Oh yes phrases you’ve heard that lodge in YOUR brain forever and ever! Baby horse woman is mine, perhaps name me one of yours.
Have you ever listened into a conversation, overheard people chatting at a bus stop only to hear a phrase or saying that for some unknown reason, becomes hard wired into your brain, lodged in your consciousness, so much so out of all the other hundreds of human voices you’ve listened into that day you’ll remember this ONE phrase for the rest of the day? Perhaps be able to recall and quote it by the end of the week? Or incredibly it will seep back into your psyche at the most inopportune moment for the rest of the year! Life!
Of course you have and for some reason my brain will NEVER forget Baby Horse Woman and here’s I think why, it’s a natural World conundrum, three living images that are perfect in every way, a question that’s rather profound but perhaps most of all a puzzle that exercises my brain………………. lol over and over again!
Further still, I will run any number of combinations whilst idly sitting on a bus, or deep in thought walking to work! Here’s just a few.
I cannot think of any images more beautiful in all of nature. Not one.
I cannot think of a 4th worthy of inclusion, I’ll rack my brain but I honestly can’t come up with a 4th that deserves inclusion, not one! I’ll run through the order in my brain, are they equally beautiful or is there a 1st 2nd and 3rd?
If there is a 123 then which comes first?
If you were to ask me, lol a naked woman is 1st but I’d guess a mother would say the angelic serenity of her sleeping baby wins hands down.
Conundrum’s such as these can never be answered and you’ll of course have your own that’ll keep your brain ticking over when you’re bored, I have many.
So that’s the phrase hard wired into my brain.
A rather personal story follows which may not be of interest but was fun to write 🙂
The human brain holds a deep fascination for me, I’ve attended lectures given by eminent University Professors, I’ve purchased many books, always watch the latest TV documentaries and perhaps in part my interest is because I suffer from a brain disease! Yep each day I take 3 tablets, twice a day morning and evening, and they suppress electrical activity in such away that neurologists have pinpointed the dose at which they stop me having lol wild limb uncontrollable fits, and yet not tooo strong a mix of chemicals that would stop me functioning as a living human being.
My tablets are a potent mix of chemical compounds, if I take too many in one dose they alter enough activity in my brain, they suppress enough electrical activity to such an extent my eyesight becomes blurred and I’m unsteady on my feet, in effect they temporarily shut down brain functions.
Perhaps now you see why I often talk about my brain lol in a WordPress Post!
Why is it you can close your eyes and across your minds eye see the face of your first girlfriend in picture perfect clarity? Or say (I’m not married) why is it a mother could close her eyes and see a picture perfect photograph of the first occasion she set eyes on her daughter wearing her brilliant white wedding dress? Amazing fascinating and incredible.
Lol and I’ll not even begin to discuss human consciousness and the reason why we believe in supernatural spirits, have blind faith in the concept of an almighty God so much so that when we take our last human breathe, die so to speak why an earth have our brains convinced ourselves we will meet this spirit in an afterlife?
Yep I’m an unbeliever an open minded atheist, I don’t believe in Gods but I TRULLY wish I did because belief gives life a purpose, an end in sight that’s worth living through pain and hardship for, because you’re utterly convinced we’ve been put on earth for a reason? An amazing organ is the brain and that’s quite enough of atheism.
Returning to overheard sayings that remain with you for eternity, btw when you make it to the afterlife I guess your wonderful amazing brain remembers all life’s happy memories, photos of your loved ones and keeps them safe for ever and ever and ever? The amount of dirty legal consensual sexual activities I’ve gotten up to in my life, with ladies btw I’m not talking frigging sheep! Lolol, do they stay with me forever?
AND never ever forget this astonishing organ is the sole reason we enjoy sex! Experts say at the point of ejaculation, dopamine adrenalin serotonin and other mind altering pleasure giving neuro transmitters are coursing through the brain.