File this under happy childhood memories, my first true love 🙂 .
A thought just crossed my mind, I’d guess I’m not only person to have fallen in love with their school teacher, no love is tooo emotive a word, sexual infatuation fits better or is experiencing strong feelings towards an adult every child’s first real sexual awakening, a young teenager’s rights of passage have you will?
Up until age thirteen the only adults touching your lives are parents, best friend’s parents, and of course Secondary School teachers perhaps Sunday School teachers but let’s not go there especially ‘those’ Catholics!
And let’s push pretty-boy idolised musicians and sexy movie sirens to one side, again they don’t count because I’m referring to real people touching our young informative years,
………….. and of course me being me I’ve a female teacher in my thoughts!
I’d guess every twenty-something adult embarking on the teaching profession, especially if they are rather good looking, will be well aware their young prodigies will almost definitely develop crushes, after all skilled teachers are wise, intelligent and quite probably amusing human beings with engaging personalities, authoritative adults you grow to respect, jeeze who wouldn’t fall head over heels in love?
Oh yes before I meander right off topic, this afternoon I wandered past my old Secondary School, a dog walking change of scenery long story!
Stopping for a second by the gates, I glanced across at the rather imposing School House and memories of Miss Steer my old English teacher came flooding back, and no she wasn’t a buxom blonde twenty-something slip of a girl, actually the previous Term she had been referred to as Mrs Unsworth, I guess a little known divorce had been finalised in between and she’d reverted back to a late thirties single woman again,
And just imagine now! She’s is either dead or quite possibly living as a resident in a retirement home, now there’s a thought! Hmm I hope she enjoyed a happy fulfilling life and I’m almost certain Miss Steer was childless.
Anyways, perhaps unsurprisingly a middle aged woman became my schoolboy crush infatuation, so no change there then! She was slim and unsmiling severe, all knowing cool and classy with an uncompromising disciplinarian manner, always wearing appropriate length grey pencil skirts, figure hugging so accentuating her wide hips and as I remember her blouses were often white.
Intriguingly white for they possessed a phenomenon that only revealed itself when her back was toward the assembled class……… a common trait among English teachers writing on a blackboard the consequence I gazed at her lingerie and bottom the whole lesson, and I should add zero cleavage was on show and important to my tale, her hidden boobs were very possibly the smallest a woman could possess?
Oh and I’ve just remembered, seeing as she was only 5′ 5″ high heels were a given, with yes obligatory black stockings, so pencil skirts heels and stockings tells me as an adult male of 50 years, Miss Steer was a very classy lady radiating a feminine sexuality missing from teachers of today!
Have you guessed the reason Miss Steer’s lingerie is such a vivid memory yet?
Well the rear panel to her blouse was very nearly opaque, made of a thinner see-through sheer fabric the consequence Miss Steer’s bra band and two straps were visible to all! I must stress again she dressed completely appropriately for a woman of her position, but a hint of repressed sexuality if not ignited definitely smoldered within that tiny frame, and remember this is the early 1980s, a pre internet more innocent era where ‘YouPorn videos’ of naked women were but a wishful fantasy!…………….. Keep on track Andrew!
Where was I? Oh yes am I correct assuming perspiring backs is the reasoning behind blouses such as these? However I must stress again, myself and we assembled children thought nothing remotely untoward with her dress, infatuation amongst the boys perhaps a giggle and smiles from the girls.
Two lessons a week, term after term I’d sit for hours upon end watching Miss Steer scribble painful grammar rules on a blackboard, her sticks of white chalk scratching scraping text for hours upon end, hmm perhaps Miss Steer and her visible bra is the reason I write blog posts and read books? A feminine silhouette beguiling my concentration, an infatuation breathing fire into my imagination.
I cannot remember if I experienced penis erections, I’d still yet to masturbate for the first time, so no I very much doubt I experienced little more than wonderment, again this is pre internet, years before easily accessible, sexually disgusting imagery and I’d yet to see photos of naked women’s vulvas unbelievable I know, my only recollection was paging through the women’s underwear section of my mother’s ‘Kays catalogs’!
So pray why do I remember this lady so vividly? Well my beguiling fascination doesn’t need repeating and you’ll have possibly guessed there is a second reason, my one and only liberty taken with a school teacher, an overstep which could have gotten me into trouble, a distant memory that often returns and one I’ll possibly remember when I to am sitting in a Carehome comfy chair.
Jeeze cheer up Andrew 😀 .
😊 Once upon a time, seated in a lesson many years ago, I handed Miss Steer my exercise book with completed fictional story, an exercise she’d previously set as homework. My best friend sitting alongside me understood my anxiety and I can remember now bitterly regretting ever having written such a story moments before handing over my work of childhood fiction. Do I remember both the plot, her prompting question or whether it was any good? No of course not, however I remember clear as day writing about loving her small pointy breasts, omg what was I thinking to take such an inappropriate liberty? And understanding that I was anxious is an understatement of gigantic proportions.
Sick to the stomach I was, followed by restless sleepless nights, however I smile today at both my foolhardy bravery and amazed I ever dared pull such a stunt! Hmm I blame it on the hormones!
So did Miss Steer tell me off, humiliate me in front of the entire class, no of course not, this possibly first real regret of my life, a misjudgment that had triggered insomnia was never once referred to ever again, but I’d like to imagine Miss Steer smiled or laughed out loud, because if my WordPress is any measure to compare to I’d guess I got a little over excited and didn’t hold back, the reason my storytelling regret was so bitterly heartfelt, I did overstep an unwritten rule sharing my love of her little tiny breasts, definitely one of my fondest schoolboy memories and jeeze I even had a boob obsession as a teenager.
………….. no change there then!
So did you have a childhood crush for that very special Teacher? Or perhaps you are a teacher aware girls or boys had a crush on you?
©A. Shepherdson 2019