Virginity musings


(Categorise this post under thoughts and opinions, it is what is, me thinking out aloud 🙂 .)

Virginity – dictionary definition – untouched unspoilt untainted unadulterated pure and ‘in mint condition!’ (a lot of un’s in there!)

Oh and a little free advice for you, ‘wait for that special person, wait many years if needs be, but don’t under any circumstances give your most precious personal possession to someone who DOESN’T deserve it!’ Now please read on. 😀

Go on-line and you may stumble across an internet forum revealing ‘men’ will pay good money to bed a virgin first, I know incredible or what, Oxford University Students have been selling theirs on-line, that’s until quite rightly eBay put a stop to such inappropriate behaviour :/ then again there is that student loan to pay for?

Yep we were all virgins once, and btw Meghan wore a white dress on her big day? Looking divine yes but there should be a LAW against brides walking down the aisle in white if no longer virgin pure……….. just saying lol! Perhaps the lady should keep a certificate of authenticity and if ‘her hymen is torn make her wear scarlet! I’m only JOKING 😀 virgin white looks so flattering on a lady, any lady.

Incidentally I can visualise clear as day, aged 13 sitting in a sex ed class and a schoolgirl asking our teacher “is a hymen broken only during sex?” My two thoughts at the time were, ‘what is a hymen?’ And ‘how’s it broken during sex? And if your interested, the (female) teacher said “no, a girl’s hymen can be damaged through vigorous physical activity” and for what it’s worth I was even more confused. Happy days.

Back in the real world, at some point during every wedding I’ve been invited to, the bride’s white dress has me wondering ‘is she ACTUALLY a virgin?’ And being totally honest I couldn’t imagine marrying unless I’d experienced the joys of her flesh first, no seriously we are all sexual animals and jeeze just imagine after consummating on your wedding night only to lay there gazing at the bedroom ceiling thinking………….. ‘OMG what have I done?’ (Btw I have listened to sex before marriage discussions between fathers in my workplace)

And isn’t virginity an absolutely deliciously evocative word, or perhaps you prefer ‘deflowered’ or ‘ruination’ or ‘tainted’, amuses me how the absence of chastity is perceived as a mistake or worse, I guess many a father with daughters will have sleepless nights imagining their princesses out on a first date especially remembering how he so wanted inside a girl’s knickers at that youthful age? AND while I’m in free flow I can’t help thinking to myself when looking at that cartoon top left, did the Virgin Mary want another man’s child even if he was our supreme heavenly creator? Hmm I guess she was lucky to be God’s first, okay I know this post is (kinda) politically incorrect but its been fun to dream up.

The moment Charles realises Sarah wasn’t the virgin he once thought she was

Then again history and literature is littered with sad tales of women who’ve regretted or mislaid theirs, for example within the pages of John Fowles excellent novel The French Lieutenant’s Woman and the chilling moment Charles Smithson looks down to see a red patch of blood between Sarah Woodruff’s parted thighs as he withdrew. Up until that moment he’d assumed her a scarlet woman, a whore abused by many a seagoing sailor. But no after laying Sarah inside a cheap hotel bedroom in the sea port village of Lime Regis, Charles life changed forever realising he’d forced a virgin’s delicate hymen, ALL preconceptions of her moral character and position in Victorian society were gone forever!

(As an aside, John Fowles excellent novel ‘The French Lieutenant’s Woman’ possesses a conceit I’m loathed to share………… ok I will only because I’ve not come across it either before or since. Fowles story has a choice of two endings, by that I mean written in two separate Chapters, Fowles leaves you the reader to decide which he/she prefers……… rather clever don’t you think?)

And who could ever forget poor unfortunate Tess? At first raped by a fake d’Urberville, then shunned by Angel Clare when he discovered she wasn’t a virgin!!

A second virgin’s tale for you and this one’s a little upsettingly true! As recent as the 1930’s hundreds of young women were separated from their loving families and forcibly sent to a Manor House in deepest rural Oxfordshire. 

Pray tell me why A. Shepherdson? Come on you can guess, think of the pretty slip of a girl, she may have been a chamber maid working for the husband of the house who one hellish night visited her bedroom, abused his position of power and authority (#MeToo?) the consequence her shamed family sending the fallen Maid to a secluded village for 9 months, and most tragic of all at the moment of birth the new born was taken away from her without even allowing her hold for fear of bonding. An act of pure unadulterated sadism and heartbreakingly true.

I fell instantly in love with Sarah Miles and pictured above you see a movie still taken from ‘Ryan’s Daughter’s’ only sex scene!

😀 A THIRD virginity tale for you, (coz I’m on a roll!) Have you ever watched Director David Lean’s gorgeous epic masterpiece that is Ryan’s Daughter? The movie is a favourite of mine, a love story following Sarah Mile’s character who’s lol a virgin, and you could describe the tale a sexual awakening set in a small Southern Irish village 1916.

Briefly Sarah falls in love with the School’s Headmaster played by the great Robert Michum, she marries him however her wedding night is a sexual disappointment NO a frigging disaster, Sarah expected her earth to move instead a passionless Michum ‘shot his load’ in missionary position leaving her utterly devastated, sex wasn’t all she hoped and dreamed for. However later in the movie Sarah meets a British Army Officer convalescing from his injuries in the Trenches of Northern France, they fall PASSIONATELY in love and David leads our two characters to an eerie atmospheric forest where Sarah makes love to her army Officer and experiences the joy she’d so hoped and yearned for.

If you enjoy romance movies with a twist why not watch ‘Ryan’s Daughter’, and I haven’t given you any real spoilers plus you’ll have forgotten this by the time you’ve seen it. BUT my point is (you mean there is a point?) Virgin Sarah married a man she’d never slept with and sex wasn’t as intimate and passionate as romantic novels had led her to believe. Jeeze human being’s are sexual animals, surely there has to be a sexual union before marriage or my guess there may be problems ahead.

Lol discuss! (OK you’re not going to answer but I thought I’d ask anyway 😀 )

And never argue with me when I say we do form opinions depending on whether someone is virgin chaste or not, (you mean you weren’t?) We all remember the girl at school who had a ‘reputation’, yet conversely a boy who sleeps around is considered a ‘Jack The Lad’? I lost mine later in life and now you’ve the notion in your mind that I’m oddball strange, a loser and rather sad!

Come on be honest yes you have! 


( 🙂 Change of plan, I’ve decided not to publish Thursday and Friday.)


©A. Shepherdson 2019 (Googled photographs are not my own)


One thought on “Virginity musings

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in: Logo

You are commenting using your account. Log Out /  Change )

Google photo

You are commenting using your Google account. Log Out /  Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )

Connecting to %s