Facemask lingerie……… or what to do with used PPE

So my question for today is, “could you pull this look off?”

Or then again the phrase ‘ingenuity is the mother of all invention’ comes to mind.

Pulling this look off depends on boob size I guess, if you’re an A size bra cup (possibly a AA) like Rianne Meijer above then you’ll have little to worry about, they’ll neither jiggle or bounce whilst she walks however larger endowed ladies of a certain age may struggle, and regrettably real life takes its toll, after a lady has nursed her offspring they’ll sag a little no doubt pendulously swinging from side to side, I’m not being disrespectful mind! I think it’s wonderful mothers breastfeed their babies, nurturing them with warm milk so they’ll grow healthy and cognitive with strong bones oh and a little sweet tasting as I’m reliably informed.

Yes I said sugary sweet but note I’ve never tasted………… unfortunately 😦 .

Many many months ago I commented a mummy blogger as to the taste of her breastmilk and she replied lol ‘a little sweeter than cows milk Andrew’, well you gotta ask haven’t you. Anyways before I (don’t) meander into my love of women’s breasts yet again (yawn)…….. what was I chatting about? Oh yes question for the day ‘could you pull-off a bra look made from disposable face masks’ and I’ve concluded the smaller boobed lady could but breastfeeding mothers and bustier ladies may struggle, I guess if you’re of a high round firm B cup maybe C you’ll be ok, but D’s and DD+ may be light on support but omg for us guys the results would make for spectacular viewing as they bounced their unsupported jig beneath tight fitting jersey’s.

The Dutch influencer I’m sharing above has been slammed online after fashioning a bikini from old facemasks, Rianne Meijer shocked and offended her Instagram followers (well there’s a surprise lol) by wearing a bikini fashioned from yes facemasks, and all I can add is I admire her results, disposable mask material is designed to concertina outwards covering a human animals nose mouth and chin, and looking at Rianne’s AA cup boobs her facemasks appear to cover and support beautifully………. and don’t you think azure blue is such a flattering colour on a woman and the matching knickers are a work of art! 😀

You didn’t know this but one of my more useless life skills is guessing, correctly I might add, a woman’s correct bra size, yep I’ll look at her pair of boobs and can tell you if she’s an A cup B C or DD whatever, a talent honed from my lifetime’s gazing at women’s breasts but that’s a whole other on-line posting, 😀 .

I have a social media theory I’ve touched on before. When followers reply comments like these below Rianne’s posting:

Why you waste masks like that?” One person wrote, while another simply said: “Just no.”

“What a waste of PPE,” another person commented, with another saying: “You are so great & I love your content usually. But wasting masks is not something that should be advertised.”

But come on are they actually disgusted? Are they really deeply offended? Or are they just making their voice heard and trying to provoke a reaction? I’d guess the second, they’ll comment and click the send button and being as the youth of today have the concentration timespan of a goldfish, seconds later they’ll ‘swipe’ to another Tweet or Instagram photo and dream up some other pithy humorous offended reply hoping that others like and share, it’s only the 5% of nasty bullying Trolls who are in truth angry and that’s a reflection of their personalities in real life……….. I blame the frigging media, it’s their fault these harmless ‘offended’ replies are taken seriously, for heaven’s sake why does the BBC share a selection of Tweets written by G list celebrities beneath a serious News story? I neither care for these musicians and soap actors opinions and as I said before, they’re NOT that offended anyway.

Returning to beautiful sexy Rianne, what I say is lighten up, at the least the young lady is upcycling disposable facemasks into brand new bra’s, as we know mask plastic fabric is unrecyclable ending it’s useful life discarded and thrown in City streets across the globe, or heartbreakingly it’s elastic straps entwined around a birds feet or sucked into dolphins and whales stomachs 😦 , jeeze we invent these wonderful products yet don’t think about what to do with them when used and the affect on nature is upsetting.

So for heavens sake lighten up with the criticism I say, now if every girl fills her knicker draw with bras fashioned from old facemasks then just imagine the positive affects for our environment, so I’ve a suggestion for all you ladies out there, whether A or DD cup go to your bedroom and lock the door, seat yourselves before your vanity mirror, carefully construct a bra from facemasks, strip naked topless and put on the delicate to admire the effect……… and why not start a movement and POST THE PICTURES ON YOUR INSTAGRAM!

A. Shepherdson 2021

(Remember I have the utmost respect for women who have breastfed their babies and would NEVER make fun at their expense.)

My work colleague’s Sexy selfies!

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Not Lizzie’s actual selfie, but you get the idea

I KNOW a young lady who posts semi nude photos of herself on the internet, yep Lizzie (for the purposes of this post) shows scantily clad selfies of herself wearing colourful bikinis she’s gonna use on holiday…. and there’s more! You’ll hardly believe this true, but wow she also posts selfies wearing tasteful white lingerie… and you just don’t know how tempted I’ve been to post one…. all in the name of investigative journalism mind you!

However I’ve resisted temptation because posting on my blog is morally reprehensible, no just darn right wrong! Not forgetting revealing her identity could almost certainly get me the sack from work, infringe Copyrights on umpteen social media platforms, and most importantly of all might cause the young woman untold embarrassment.

That’s if she cares of course.

(I haven’t but jeeze I’ve been so tempted if only to prove a point…. honest!)

Let me expand this rather cautionary tale, perhaps it’ll interest you mums with daughters of your own? You see Lizzie works at the same place I do, and that’s all the detail I am going to divulge for obvious reasons, except she’s aged about twenty, an apprentice plumber (or perhaps not) by trade and a rather pretty young lady with I might add a cracking petite figure.

“Well Andrew that’s rather forward of you, isn’t it?”

Now this is where my tale gets really interesting, because a colleague happened across her Instagram account and btw not me! He’s never said how and I’ve never asked why, but I guess if you searched her name on Google, and she owns an Instagram account, then you WILL easily find her….. a cautionary tale indeed. 

Well cutting a short story shorter, the majority of Lizzie’s photos are of pets Grandparents and friends and surprisingly accessible to public viewing (though not all), but there’s more! To my guys astonishment, Lizzie shares full body length photos of herself, captured in her bedroom gazing at her reflection in a mirror with a mobile phone to hand, and yes there are photos of herself wearing bikinis, clubbing outfits and omg white lingerie!

I’m not ashamed to say we men have all viewed her Instagram, it’s been passed around the department like naughty schoolboys sharing porn images with their chums….. btw I’d like to strongly protest that I haven’t downloaded these images.

I haven’t, but here’s the point I could have screenshot her wearing ******* print bikinis, I’d guess some colleagues might have but she’s over 18, they’re public viewing so who’d care if they’re into that kind of thing… and unworried if the wife inspects their mobile phone! 😫

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Well if she were my daughter I’d be concerned

So my question is, does Lizzie suspect we’ve seen these revealing photos, you know wearing her bra and panties? There’s a thought, all I do know is sharing compromising photos on the internet has consequences, nosy guys find them, images get uploaded onto porn sites AND potentially you could see one posted onto a middle aged guy’s WordPress.

MY WP! 🤫 

Jeeze, now wouldn’t that have made for an entertaining read 😂 .

 

A. Shepherdson 2020

NO longer can I avoid buying a Smart phone

Eagle eyed readers to my WordPress ❤ of which there are several, will be aware only my little toe is dipped into the pool inhabited by users of social media, unlike the majority of the Global population.

I’m not on social media, I don’t have an Instagram, Facebook doesn’t ‘float my boat’ and as for Twitter? Why has a tyrannical image of Donald Trump appeared in my mind? Nope I’ll pass on Tweeting my ‘many’ opinions but I’m not necessarily trashing Twitter, and don’t forget many a blogger has a feed alerting followers to their new Posts 🙂 Tweeting is the way forward bloggers!

Pictured above resting comfortably on the palm of my hand is YES my mobile phone, a trusty friend that’s accompanied me on many a sexy afternoon with a lady, I love my Nokia! I can make a phone call, send a text using character written emojis, the alarm awakes me out of bed at 5.45 every morning, a torch function is helpful at times, the battery lasts two weeks without charge oh and my mobile only cost me £15 when new 😮 .

But of course as with all technology an Asian electronics corporation will release a new generation device, making the old version obsolete then you have to take out a bank loan to buy the new upgrade……………. oh and did I tell you mine’s near indestructible? Not forgetting any new phone will have a camera and I’ll HAVE to trash my £8 Fuji digital camera, incidentally have you seen the photos on my countryside walking blogs? 

However I’ve realised over the past several months I WILL have to bite the bullet and purchase a Smart phone, I’m not so worried about spending my hard earned wages on one because I guess I’ll soo get used to spending hours of a day looking at the tiny screen, my index finger scrolling through websites with adverts linking me to suggested purchases via Amazon. So yes even though I’m not heavily reliant on social media I’m positive I’ll soon be hooked by this tiny genius device, I’ll be walking along the pavement eyes captivated by a tiny screen oblivious to the natural world going on about me.

(So you’ve noticed this teenage girl phenomenon as well?)

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I borrowed this photo from a News story which read ‘Girl walks off end of pier whilst checking her Facebook’ 

I’m curious to know, is it only British girls who appear to have a mobile phone glued to one hand?

When I first sit at my work bench of a morning, coffee in one hand the open pages of Metro’s free newspaper laid out before me, the Grandfather sitting to the left is looking at his Facebook feed, the middle aged father to my right is YES glued to reading his Facebook messages……….. THEN at 7.33am both will be reminded by the boss to switch their devices off.

And why do I have to buy myself a smart phone? Not because the Nokia is broken (I’d guess it’ll work for 20 years more), no, every utility Company I purchase heating gas electricity water also banking telephone from also insurance providers now have me in a virtual neck hold (or my testicles held in a vice like grip, lol you’ll have your own analogies) instructing me to operate my accounts via an ‘app’

Apparently I’ve reached a stage in my life that I need to download the relevant ‘apps’ to function as a human being and that annoys me!

😀 But give it a week and I’ll be sat at my workbench 7.20am reading WordPress blogs, watching YouTube videos and unable to understand how I ever managed to live without a Smart Phone?…………….. Actually I’m quite looking forward to getting one!

A. Shepherdson 2018

 

Deleting his Facebook

Thoughts and opinions are all my own, and if you disagree with me then that’s absolutely fabulous ❤

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‘I’m not on Facebook!’ I fear I’m in a minority here with that statement because lol I’ve haven’t heard of anyone who isn’t on FB?

A brief tale for you and I’ll keep this short because I do get side tracked! Last Wednesday whilst chatting to a 21year old colleague at work (btw NO one is aware I have a WordPress….not that I know of!) This pleasant young guy and myself somehow got on to the subject of Facebook, probably Mark Zuckerberg sharing our personal data with every corporation and business under the sun started the conversation, well without prompting by myself Alex said something that quite made him chuckle, 😀

“Last night I deleted my Facebook and NO ONE noticed!” I should say at this juncture he’s NOT by nature an attention seeker? No Alex is the most laid back chilled person you could ever hope to meet, you only need to know quitting wasn’t a spur of the moment rash decision, no he’d given closing his FB a great deal of thought.

Baring in mind social media is valued by the young perhaps more than older generations appreciate, ‘Alex’ didn’t appear worried regretful or deflated by his considered decision, I sensed he was quite relieved after having planned his social Platform exit, and he was rather pleased none of his friends noticed he’d disappeared because that proved lol no one actually cared! On the other hand if for example 100 of his FB buddies had ‘WhatsApp’ messaged him saying,

OMFG (or similar excitable acronym) u jus quit FB, why???????? 😮 😮 😮 !!!!!!!!!!!!!’ 😮

Or if his many friends, for Alex is a popular guy, had called his mobile number worriedly enquiring,

“OMG Alex babe what’s happened? Why have you deleted your Facebook? Are you ok?”

He’d have been gutted, but no not a single person noticed………….. which made him chuckle. 😀

Well as we chatted together that early weekday morning, before getting down to the work we were supposed to be doing, Alex went on to briefly explain the reasons why he’d finished with FB. I’ll refrain from quoting extracts from our private conversation, but interestingly quitting was unconnected to Zuckerberg’s evasive answers to American Politicians in Congress………. as with all youngster’s data sharing didn’t worry him.

Frigging worries me!

Turns out my colleague’s sole reason for quitting is as simple as time management, he’d kept a daily log of the hours spent on FB that week, you know keeping up with the many fabulous and interesting things his friends had gotten up to and even more worryingly the time he spent ‘pimpng’ up his own Profile’ (his words not mine) and as you may have guessed, Alex did the Math and the final total quite shocked him.

A lot of hours!!!

So my work colleague, after a lot of careful consideration and he didn’t take the decision lightly, Alex bit the ‘proverbial’ bullet and quit. Whether he regrets this over the weeks to come and succumbs to opening a new Account? Only time will tell but that’s missing the point.

And my point is? I think FB is fabulous and a great way of connecting with people also keeping up with what friends are doing in their lives, and I’m in NO way criticising Facebook or social media in general. My take on his momentous decision  is I guess there comes a time in any young adult’s life, perhaps beginning work, cooking for oneself, when they realise social media has taken over their lives, consuming precious time that should be used dating real human beings or just enjoying the fruits and benefits of one’s newly paid labour……………. and lol that dreaded chain around every adult’s neck called responsibilities!

And if you are at all curious I’m neither on FB or ever intend to be, note I have nothing against this social Platform and make no judgement on the people who do use it because I know I am in a minority. But FB isn’t for me I’ll go further by saying I’m not entirely convinced any middle aged guy should own a Facebook, it just doesn’t sit right with me, my opinion is social media platforms should be the preserve of teenagers also lonely disconnected mums/moms who’s sole wish is to keep in touch with their friends………………I have female relatives who are on Facebook!

(My lol jumped up opinions only, feel free to disagree with these early evening thoughts and musings 🙂 )

Having said all that Facebook is the effective way to share WordPress posts, it makes sense to share your thoughts with circles of close friends on Twitter etc because blogging can be a lonely place, I understand this but I write because it’s good for my mental health, and no I’m afraid I won’t be appearing on a Facebook near you anytime sooon. 🙂 

©A. Shepherdson 2018