FULL MOON – from my rear garden – 22/12/2018

This is my response to WordPress blogger author Laura (click here) and if you know me at all, I enjoy interacting with other bloggers 🙂 , all good fun!

“Here men from planet earth first set foot upon The moon. July 1969AD. We came in peace for all mankind” (Neil Armstrong)

Below you see a picture of the Moon I photographed yesterday evening, as you are all no doubt aware, December 22nd was the shortest day, and luckily for myself we in Oxford were gifted a wonderful bright Full Moon……………. if a little cloudy! Still to this day when I gaze up at the Moon I’m both emotionally and conceptually ‘blown away’ that man walked upon it’s surface………………. very near incredible but with my ❤ heart of hearts I believe!

So how did I capture this image? By holding my camera to the telescope eyepiece hence the peripheral black circular border……….. hmm I’m happy with it and definitely the ‘best of the rest 😀 .’ Incidentally the darker surface patches you see are named ‘seas’, as in Sea Of Tranquillity’ ‘Sea of Serenity’ ‘Sea Of Fertility’ etc.

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Full Moon December 22nd 2018, photograph taken by my eBay purchased digital camera looking directly through my telescope eyepiece. With-out Moon Filter (please feel free to copy if you wish).

Picture below reminds me I never painted my garden fence in 2018 😦 .

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My Skywatcher Refracting Optical Telescope pointing toward tonight’s Full Moon, picture taken from my back garden 22/12/2018
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Btw it’s neither raining or snowing, those white dots picked up by the camera are tiny dew droplets, the air was thick with mist and wispy clouds kept obscuring the Moon.
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Of all the photographs taken yesterday evening I think this is my favourite, a Moon Crater is clearly visible also a very much in focus edge to the Moon.
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Lens fitted with Moon Filter this time

Below more photos now see if you can spot the one’s taken without a fitted Moon Filter, and btw it’s not the length of your telescope that counts, the diameter of the first optic denotes the size of the celestial image.


And Finally, wonderful photographs taken by Apollo 11-17 astronauts standing upon the surface of the Moon. A little geeky information for you, Apollo astronauts had a fixed focus specially designed Hasselblad camera attached to their chest, to which 70mm film magazines were fitted each taking 165 frames, along with moon rocks the photos were the only objects to return and are now stored inside a refrigerated building in Texas. Several years ago the 70mm film was defrosted over 24 hours, rolled out and unfurled then digitally scanned. After wonderful scan shots had been taken they were rolled up again and back into freezer storage.

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YouTube’s ‘How To fix something yourself’ videos are fabulous

Watching YouTube videos is great fun if you have time to waste spare, but amongst the skateboarding border collie videos, or women taking part in braless wet tee shirt competitions! Would you like to see videos of wet tee shirt competitions? No? Ok no. 😁

(Each to their own lol)

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But sift through all the YouTube silliness and you will discover ‘How to’ videos both filmed and starring men and women showing/instructing/demonstrating to the viewer ‘How To’ fix something anything! Several years ago I installed a complete new bathroom suite and virtually learnt to tile walls by watching YouTube videos uploaded by enthusiastic amateurs, and yes they knew what they were doing and had the digital footage to help.

Now cutting a short story even shorter, I’ve filmed several ‘How to’ videos such as ‘How to cast concrete’ and to answer your next question ‘why do people do this?’ The reason why is as simple as passing on tips and ideas whether cooking, gardening or installing a kitchen sink. I’ve filmed several because they’re fun, lol I have a frustrated TV presenting ego but most importantly I’d love to think I’ve saved someone their hard earned money by having a try themselves………….. after all finding a Tradesmen, finding a Tradesman who will do a good job and won’t charge you a fee you’ll need a small bank loan to pay for, are all bloody nightmares. 

(Ok if you have a young family then I DO understand spare time is non existent.)

Jeez I watch those Tradesmen cowboys on the telly, thick unskilled highwaymen who’ll rip off innocent pensioners out of their savings……….. AND do a botched job!

Agreed?

Many years ago my Central Heating Pump stopped working, *****d it was, I remember opening the airing cupboard door gazing at the pump beside the copper water tank and thinking tooo myself, shall I fix it myself or call a Gas Fitter? Yep I opened my copy of Yellow Pages, took a punt on a guy I’d never heard of before, and yes he installed a new pump and yes my credit card took a hammering! He did a good job but overcharged me for the parts (after comparing his invoice to internet prices) and his frigging labour charges were astronomical (all Tradesmen are astronomical), so from that point on I promised myself to find and watch self-made YouTube videos and within reason have a go myself.

Now ok I’m an engineer by trade but still to this day I get a little nervous taking something apart myself and all I can advise is confidence is key. So here’s two observations, I’d say if you are both intelligent and practical then simple DIY isn’t rocket science, be methodical take your time, do your research and most importantly you’ll save money so why not have a go at fixing that wonky door?…..… Ok if the project involve electrics then DO NOT attempt it yourself EVER, get an electrician in who’ll do a safe and secure job, however I’d say most other ‘small’ projects are doable.

Hmm so now I am asking myself have I just explained in four paragraphs information you already know? After all that’s why people spend their Sundays wandering around DIY shops looking for paint wood nails and tools! Not to worry, the point to tonight’s post is ‘How To change a Washing Machine Door Seal’, this is the introduction the instructional post and accompanying video for my little YouTube Channel will follow sooon. 

Looking at the picture below my reason for fitting a new seal is simple for all to see, mildew mould! As you know if you allow cold water to settle on a surface give it time and mildew grows, whether that be window seals or bathroom tile grouting, mould is unhealthy unsightly and impossible to remove and my washing machine is a case in point. Just recently several black marks have appeared on freshly washed clothes and I have an idea where they came from!

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My Washing Machine Door Seal after removing photographed 15/12/2018

A ‘How To’ post follows sooon………….. 

©A. Shepherdson 2018

Christmas Lights & busted by Security!!!

 

Listen to the audio at 2 mins 45 seconds, 😀 where I get busted by a very pleasant and friendly (Shopping Precinct) Security Guard!

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Do I have a story for you this evening, oh and this is my final photo Post of 2018!

Several hours ago I thought why not take a few photographs of my Town’s Christmas decorations and lights, so carrying my Samsung Galaxy Tablet with me, I took the short walk into Town making for to the Main Shopping Precinct. Then for the next 15 minutes I photographed the lights also a video up above, I must admit I could see I looked a little conspicuous holding the Tablet aloft walking down an empty Street at 9.30pm.

Oh yes the photos, you’ll see a 10ft diameter Tree decoration at one entrance, and a Christmas Tree with flashing lights at the Cinema entrance, well by coincidence at the same time as I’d finished filming a Security Guard, very pleasant he was to, strode up to me to ask what I was in fact doing?

He went on to say the Police had been watching ME on their CCTV then contacted the Guard to have a word in ‘my shell like’ ear……………… anyways not to worry he made me laugh, I guess overt Security is a sign of the sad times we live in. Happy Christmas 🙂

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A 10 feet diameter Christmas tree decoration…….. quite impressive actually

 

©A. Shepherdson 2018

Am I (slightly) Racist? Sometimes I don’t know how to answer

(A quick afterthought, I realised at the time of writing my post, selectively choosing passages from D. Trump speeches would be controversial, problematic! I dislike the man and for what it’s worth this isn’t a post about Trump, yes a mistake to selectively quote him but at worst I guess the photos are good ‘click bait’. Andrew)

Ok I understand if we’re discussing racism, a loss of National Identity then quoting D. Trump is a writer’s wet dream…………….. not that I have sexy dreams about Trump but you get the idea .

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Now for many British folk, transpose the word Mexico to Syria, and I have to admit Mr Trump’s spoken quotation rings a little true! Then again I am male, white, middle aged and working class……… a Right Wing disciple?
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Ok this quotation is just darn right bizarre! Trump ‘hates Blacks counting his money’ but he’s happy to have ‘Skullcap wearing Orthodox Jewish men’ (googled) count his filthy lucre? Like I said bizarre!

Crop2Does a multicultural Britain worry me? If I’m completely honest yes it does, when I look at my mother’s photographs taken of her as a child in the 1950’s, each and every face therein is white of European descent, so am I a racist? No! Am I a white supremacist? Most definitely NOT! However please read on.

I’m employed let us say as support staff within a ‘blank’ establishment blah blah blah, for the past nigh on 30 years I’ve worked alongside young people also ‘other’s’ more important than me (unproven lol) who originate from every Country under the Sun, Venezuela to South Korea, Sri Lanka to The United States, and if successful after 3 years and 9 Terms they all return home (lol work it out!)

So yes by any stretch of the imagination Britain has little resemblance to the post war white faced Britain of my Grandparents, we’ve become swamped by an influx of West Indians in the 60s, Indians and Pakistanis in the 70’s, 900,000 Poles post joining the EU up to and past the 2000s, and that’s not forgetting those illegals taking the train beneath The English Channel from the other 27 Nations, NOT forgetting more recently migrant refugees from Syria, so many migrants now live within London and most metropolitan cities the European population dissolved into the Counties.

Are you shocked? What if your Granddaughter cannot find a house to buy because 900,000 Poles have moved here, true or not immigration not Brexit is the reason Britain’s are angry.

So I ask myself does it really matter Britain’s evolved from a 95% white population in 1945 to well, every Nation under the Sun in 2018? On the one hand immigration is the reason Britain is in such a political mess and that’s a frigging understatement! For those of you reading from your homes abroad, I’m quite popular in India btw looking by my statistics I’m loving that. For those of you who are under the impression our Brexit debate has been about leaving Europe? I’m here to tell you it is NOT, Brexit’s about immigration full stop, then again I watch the News from across the Globe and migration is every Countries perceived overriding problem worry, whether the Turkish influx into Germany or the North Africans walking into France or D. Trump building his blessed Wall to keep South American’s out, Migration of human beings scares each and every one of us and I’m afraid if you disagree then I’d say lol you are lying? Or “Less than contrite with the truth” as Bill Clinton would say.

Discuss 🙂 .

(Hmm now I’ve upset someone! Did you know 9 months writing and I haven’t received a single hateful comment? I’d guess that’s because I’m neither a woman and perhaps not as talented a ‘writer’ as I sometimes like to think then again I’m happy here…………. the old adage be careful what you wish comes to mind.)

So am I a racist? A question I ask of myself at least every single hour, ok several times a day, today I saw a photo of an Asian gentleman standing at the corner of Hyde Park, Speaker’s Corner where under British Law one is legally allowed to say whatever he/she wishes to without fear of arrest (lol perhaps google that fact before visiting.) Returning to my perfectly decent Pakistani gentleman in the photo HE was displaying a banner saying ‘Sharia Law in Britain NOW!’ Knowing the scare stories that I do concerning Sharia Law, I’m saddened to imagine a Britain Governed under such mysterious Laws when our Centuries old ones legislate just fine………. well ok they’re lol less than adequate but you get the idea, they punishes wrongdoers and lock up the evil.

(My understanding of Sharia Law is that women are treated as second class citizens.)

Hmm so am I racist wishing for the good old utopian days of post war Britain and there lies my problem, I enjoy the company of being with people from across the Globe, especially the beautiful East European girl who serves me Costa Coffee at breaktime! But I do worry my National Identity is disappearing fast, I’m not a racist because I’m a nice guy people person, but the shear numbers who’ve migrated here, with their own beliefs and customs means I’m afraid to say, yes the British Identity of my youth is fast disappearing.

Now please hear me out 🙂 .

Several months ago I visited The Tower Of London, such an atmospheric historic place for those who wish to immerse themselves in 1000years of English History, I clearly remember walking up a stone staircase in one of the Towers and feeling the overwhelming sense I was following in the very same steps as Elizabeth I, possibly the only Monarch who captures my imagination, quite an emotional experience actually understanding without a shadow of any doubt way back in the 1600’s she climbed this staircase. I was ACTUALLY stepping through the ghosts of Henry VIII, Sir Walter Raleigh, Sir Thomas Moore all such evocative and important names in my Country’s history, THEY WERE WITH ME and my imagination quite ran away with me.

Why such pride and fascination? Simply because though the names of my ancestors are lost in the midst of time, technically I could trace my lineage back to those 1600s because they’re all English by birth, I ask you does your Country’s history mean anything to you? Again hours later I recall standing beside Tower Green, the place where Anne Boleyn lost her head, asking myself  “do those Syrian beggars standing outside upon Tower Hill where so many Traitors were beheaded, really give a s*** about My England?”

Hmm life moves on, as my Grandfather used to say “good or bad you cannot stop progress.” 

And please don’t get me started on English Literature, will Shakespeare, Hardy, Dickens, Len Deighton, whoever become authors names lost in time, perhaps it’s always been this way, in fifty years from now Grandmothers will be lamenting the long ago days of X Factor, saddened because a Grandchild won’t have a clue what she’s talking about.

(Hmm I’m 😀 just reminded, I’ve never read a Shakespeare Play in my entire life!!! Watched all the Hollywood movies though.)

Lol the British White Tribe are angry and if we leave Europe and Japanese car plants move abroad then we’re all screwed! Am I racist? No. But if losing my perceived National Identity beneath a sea of cultures happens then yes I guess I am, do I enjoy the Company of people from across the four corners of our Globe? Then that answer is an unequivocal yes.

A famous quotation for you.

“…………did an English Missionary living and working in China think himself English or Chinese? English of course, the British immigrant population are no different, their home is the Country they were born in………….”

So which famous Politician am I quoting there? Enoch Powell of course, to some a racist to others his Prophecies have come true. 

And finally.

Only the other day I was discharged from Hospital, cared for by lovely kind skilled nurses from Europe Asia Australia……… , lovely people all, so please if my silly little post has offended anyone I sincerely apologise…… the real joy of having a ‘WordPress’ is we can dissect complex political arguments without fear of censure, peace and love ❤ Andrew. 

©A. Shepherdson 2018

Memory problems…… what memory problems?

‘While mild forgetfulness can be a normal part of aging, it can also be a sign of more serious memory problems, such as amnestic mild cognitive impairment, dementia, or even Alzheimer’s disease.’ 

(U.S. Department of Health & Human Services.)

In all seriousness I sometimes worry if I’m losing my mind’s awareness of what’s going on around me, the conscious powers of my brain are starting to ‘tail-off?’, or can my forgetfulness be just another consequence of getting old………………. like one’s pubic ‘bush’ thinning out, so you’ve noticed to!!

Forgetfulness

I’m age 50! I’ll walk into a room knowing that I’m supposed to be looking for something but for the life of me I cannot remember what I was looking for, it happens all the time! A humorous line often said by many an aging adult, HOWEVER very true if more than a little worrying!

Last night before bedtime I walked into the bathroom and instantly saw an empty toothpaste tube on the shelf above the sink, it was empty that same morning when I told myself “I must buy a replacement”………… I didn’t, the consequence last night I had to cut the tube’s nozzle off and scrape out enough paste to brush my teeth, well at least I’m saving money and doing my bit to prolong the planet!

In all seriousness my moments of forgetfulness does sharpen the mind, more than a little disconcerting, my father now suffers from severe memory loss and I’ve written about caring for elderly parents before! We as a family first noticed his forgetfulness and blossoming deterioration about three years ago, it’s only in hindsight that you can pinpoint the beginnings of dementia and how bad it’s become, the process creeps up on you. First there’s the absent minded forgetfulness then several years later he stopped all engaging conversation, it’s heart-breaking to witness especially when I remember he was a University educated schoolteacher………………. dementia has zero regard for a human being’s intelligence.

Here and now doing a quick bit of mental arithmetic I have about 24years to reach the age at which dad began to fail, jeez an awful lot of life can happen in 24years and who knows I may not make it? As a consequence I’m not obsessed with panicked worry assuming Alzheimer’s is about to strike (and for once I’m NOT trying to be funny), HOWEVER I’m curious at what point does a person first realise his mind’s about to slip into dementia? Why don’t we hear mental health experts telling us how to diagnose the first signs of forgetfulness, a cruel wheeze dreamt up by God that will soon rob you of all thinking reasoning and knowledge of the world and people around you? Answer medics either cannot or don’t choose to, perhaps knowing beforehand is all to scary and I’ve heard said human beings brains are just not powerful enough to cope with modern day living, hence that’s WHY we forget! The reason for forgetfulness in an aging species?

I’m going to have ‘Has anyone seen my keys?’ Engraved upon my headstone.

Or on reflection maybe I haven’t done the relevant research then again perhaps it’s best not to know, one of the biggest mistakes in life you can make is Googling a medical symptom (we’ve all done it) BECAUSE the engine’s answers will be many varied and wrong.

So I guess I’ll carry on bathing in the shower trying to remember if I’d taken that herbal mint infused bag out of my tea mug? Btw this happened 25 minutes ago 😦 .

©A. Shepherdson 2018

Has #MeToo spoilt our Christmas Party?

Now please do not read tooo much into this post, I’m a little annoyed disappointed that’s all, and it’s not a rant because my WordPress is a drama free zone where I’ll hopefully share something anything entertaining, enjoy myself and share thoughts that are on my mind………… as with this post!! For obvious reasons I rarely speak about my place of work for one because they’ll bore you to tears and two because it’s well unsafe and possibly illegal to share detail, but hey I’m going to break my self imposed rule and share an email we’ve all received below………… just keep in mind ‘#MeToo fallout’ and read on.

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A screenshot of an email sent to all Staff

Let me expand my tale with some sketchy detail, my place of work every Christmas organises an ‘office Party’ to which only support staff are invited, if last year is any indication half of guests will be women of all ages, office workers who work in HR administration PA secretaries and a (lovely brunette) receptionist.

The other half consist of males of all ages who are employed as mechanical maintenance support staff, and generally throughout the 2018 working year both sexes got on just fine, with the odd minor incident as always happens when human beings rub along together.

Last year’s Christmas meal was incident free, groups of 8 sat around tables, conversation was slightly forced but ‘it was what it was’, a sociable meal……….. then after the free glass of bubbly had been consumed and the meal finished, the male support staff tended to congregate in groups close to the bar……….. and as I’d expect females sat in groups around tables I’d guess chatting about what women like to chat about, not forgetting a handful of younger women danced whilst a young DJ played music.

Now you’re probably thinking some calamity befell the occasion, someone drank too much and there was an incident laced with sexual impropriety, an event so grave the fallout has been discussed infinitum for the rest of 2018. But I’m sorry to disappoint, nothing happened except as the evening wore on conversation noise levels increased as the chatting groups became more animated as the alcoholic beverages took affect.

However alas there wasn’t to be any kissing under the mistletoe, no male drunken fumbling within a receptionist’s blouse (incidentally my wet dream) behind a Christmas Tree, nope as I said nothing untoward happened whatsoever, as I’d guess everyone had expected when they bought the ticket, a drama free evening perhaps because the type of institution I work in everyone is responsible and extremely intelligent, and probably exactly the same as thousands of office Parties up and down the UK, Events you have to be seen attending if a little boring but with an absence of loutish inappropriate embarrassing behaviour!

So as of today Christmas Party 2018 is all booked and paid for then on Monday we receive the email above, and if you’ve read the text you’ll have guessed we basically received behavioural instructions, rules and guidelines, with threats, also informed that any inappropriate behaviour will be dealt with through HR and the usual disciplinary procedures, as it says our Party is an extension of the workplace

…….. as for the ‘drinking should’s?’ Those points are enshrined in UK Law ANYWAY!!!!

WTF!!! As you’d expect this email has not gone down tooo well, that’s an understatement! It’s of course driven by #MeToo fallout, my employer is covering itself against possible legal action, but come on, do responsible adults really need to be reminded how to behave, do they really need to be reminded of disciplinary protocol, guidelines on how to enjoy yourselves responsibly? 

Ok after the dust has settled we’re all intelligent adults, lovely people, we understand this is just another consequence of the #MeToo fallout but it hasn’t half put a damper on this supposedly fun annual event, I’d go far as to say if this email had been forwarded before booking and payment was made, going by general consensus several people say they wouldn’t have gone……………. then again that’s possibly the worst thing you could do, it surely infers to the Department’s Head that you drink tooo much and as a consequence start laying your grubby little paws on secretaries plump shapely asses……………. however on reflection, back in the real world, predatory behaviour probably blights one or two office Parties.

That’s got me thinking, what if there’s a Secretary who secretly doesn’t like me, a closet nutcase, perhaps she had plans to accuse innocent old me of groping her then get me arrested by the police, what a fabulous opportunity to take me and the Employer for millions!……………  Or am I dreaming up a world of fantasy?

Like I said at the beginning. this isn’t a rant, I understand the need for such an email but come on do we really need reminding how to conduct ourselves in a civilised society? The Head graduated from University, a very intelligent individual, yes on the whole is liked but perhaps ‘he or she’ just got over officious with language or perhaps this is a sign of legislation to come? The possibility of being sued in a Court of Law could mean ‘rest and relaxation’ events will become a thing of the past, however lol boring they may be.

And my final word to this little rant, here’s the email I would have sent? 

Dear all, I hope you enjoy the Department's various Christmas 
Events, please remember they are an extension of our/your 
workplace. 
Happy Christmas and a peaceful 2019 to you all.

©A. Shepherdson 2018

The female orgasm and note NSFW

Mild adult themed text, but please be aware contains no sexual imagery.

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I’ll be completely honest with you lovely readers who take the time to read my Blog, I do worry when someone replies to my post about caring for elderly parents, then subsequently Follows, I’m wondering are they aware my very next post could be about the female orgasm? The Tower of London? Do they realise I’m a Blog devoid of one theme? Well due to my having a very low boredom threshold (child sense of wonderment) I’ll write about whatever’s on my mind and hopefully it’s entertaining, but as Blogger Paola once commented ‘Andrew never apologise for something you’ve written.’

Introduction over.

This evening I’ve been thinking about a natural world phenomenon namely the female sexual orgasm, now I could write chapter and verse sharing both my knowledge and experiences of the males, however I won’t, but I have to admit watching a woman’s face as she masturbates to orgasm is possibly the most enthralling captivating and wonderous spectacles I’ve ever seen, and just so as you know I can tell the difference between a genuine orgasm and one faked, lol without question I can spot the difference but don’t all men say that?

However because my own sexual experiences with a lady can be described as casual relationships, I haven’t actually slept with a lady who’s experiencing a true orgasm, well not strictly true there was Karina, but if I tell you I prefer a kiss and a cuddle then you’ll understand my sexual preferences are pretty much vanilla, and as you may know from reading a previous relevant blog post, I have a strong dislike of visual pornography. Why so Andrew? Well I have little people relatives, and a cold shiver pulses down my spine at the thought an 8year old could be watching all manner of filth streamed through a media device!

But I’m a grown adult, morally well balanced, intelligent (most of the time) and sexually active so subsequently I can tell the difference between loving sex shared between two adults who care for each other, and faked pornography devoid of all humanity and emotion…………. jeeze I’m getting off message yet again, where was I oh yes the wonders of the female orgasm!

Notice I’ve flagged this post NSFW, that’s because I’m going to share with you an artistic YouTube video written by and starring Candice Dawn, she’s an author reading from her very own novel ‘Reclaiming Eros, A Heroines Journey’. Now I’ll be honest with you and admit I have neither heard of the author or read her book but I have seen this promotional video which I’ll share below and note she’s titled as Not Suitable For Work.

Amazing what you come across whilst idly surfing the internet and watching YouTube videos!

I’ll set the scene by saying Candice is sat at a table clasping her novel between both hands, then she begins reading a passage out loud to camera whilst a woman underneath her table has an Hitachi vibrator to hand, yet we see nothing apart from hearing the distant hum of her pleasure instrument’s motor pressed between Candice’s open legs. For a guy it’s quite incredible sight to see a woman lose all composure, I guess all her thoughts and concentration are channelled into reading aloud, whilst her unconscious mind is under the influence of pleasure giving chemicals coursing through regions of her brain, either way her intense emotional sexual pleasure is almost palpable………… and the results are spectacularly animated, pretty amazing actually, and a wonderous sight to behold, in fact I’m quite in awe of what a human female body is capable of……….. but please take note Candice’s video is tasteful and appropriate viewing. 

Ok you’ll have your own thoughts but remember Candice is starring in her very own promotional video 🙂 ………… the things you authors get up to!!!

A. Shepherdson 2018

NO longer can I avoid buying a Smart phone

Eagle eyed readers to my WordPress ❤ of which there are several, will be aware only my little toe is dipped into the pool inhabited by users of social media, unlike the majority of the Global population.

I’m not on social media, I don’t have an Instagram, Facebook doesn’t ‘float my boat’ and as for Twitter? Why has a tyrannical image of Donald Trump appeared in my mind? Nope I’ll pass on Tweeting my ‘many’ opinions but I’m not necessarily trashing Twitter, and don’t forget many a blogger has a feed alerting followers to their new Posts 🙂 Tweeting is the way forward bloggers!

Pictured above resting comfortably on the palm of my hand is YES my mobile phone, a trusty friend that’s accompanied me on many a sexy afternoon with a lady, I love my Nokia! I can make a phone call, send a text using character written emojis, the alarm awakes me out of bed at 5.45 every morning, a torch function is helpful at times, the battery lasts two weeks without charge oh and my mobile only cost me £15 when new 😮 .

But of course as with all technology an Asian electronics corporation will release a new generation device, making the old version obsolete then you have to take out a bank loan to buy the new upgrade……………. oh and did I tell you mine’s near indestructible? Not forgetting any new phone will have a camera and I’ll HAVE to trash my £8 Fuji digital camera, incidentally have you seen the photos on my countryside walking blogs? 

However I’ve realised over the past several months I WILL have to bite the bullet and purchase a Smart phone, I’m not so worried about spending my hard earned wages on one because I guess I’ll soo get used to spending hours of a day looking at the tiny screen, my index finger scrolling through websites with adverts linking me to suggested purchases via Amazon. So yes even though I’m not heavily reliant on social media I’m positive I’ll soon be hooked by this tiny genius device, I’ll be walking along the pavement eyes captivated by a tiny screen oblivious to the natural world going on about me.

(So you’ve noticed this teenage girl phenomenon as well?)

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I borrowed this photo from a News story which read ‘Girl walks off end of pier whilst checking her Facebook’ 

I’m curious to know, is it only British girls who appear to have a mobile phone glued to one hand?

When I first sit at my work bench of a morning, coffee in one hand the open pages of Metro’s free newspaper laid out before me, the Grandfather sitting to the left is looking at his Facebook feed, the middle aged father to my right is YES glued to reading his Facebook messages……….. THEN at 7.33am both will be reminded by the boss to switch their devices off.

And why do I have to buy myself a smart phone? Not because the Nokia is broken (I’d guess it’ll work for 20 years more), no, every utility Company I purchase heating gas electricity water also banking telephone from also insurance providers now have me in a virtual neck hold (or my testicles held in a vice like grip, lol you’ll have your own analogies) instructing me to operate my accounts via an ‘app’

Apparently I’ve reached a stage in my life that I need to download the relevant ‘apps’ to function as a human being and that annoys me!

😀 But give it a week and I’ll be sat at my workbench 7.20am reading WordPress blogs, watching YouTube videos and unable to understand how I ever managed to live without a Smart Phone?…………….. Actually I’m quite looking forward to getting one!

A. Shepherdson 2018